 |
| http://www.elements2lead.com/wp-content/ uploads/2011/12/cat-to-lion-image.jpg |
Think about the journaling and discussion today on perception and reality. Now consider the two challenges that Dean Miller poses: to see meaning as constructed (i.e., that we take part in the creation--not the discovery--of meaning); and, to see meaning as self-reflective (i.e., we see--or look for--ourselves in what we read). Consider how this relates to the novel, Please Look After Mom.
Choose one character from the novel, and write a short reflection on the construction of that character’s identity. End with a metacognitive reflection of your own sense of self; choose a quote from the following link to caption your response. Read your classmates' entries, and respond to at least two (2) classmates.
MLA; 250-500 words. Post due: Wednesday, 4/9@4PM. Responses due: Thursday, 4/10@10PM.
Mark Chua
ReplyDeleteMr. Franklin
Honors World Literature (B1)
April 4, 2014
In the concept of perception and reality, I find it really eye opening once again after the activity of looking into yourself and into your peers and decided for yourself for how peers saw your character. I found out that most of the time, we’re making junk up about others perception about ourselves. Similar to the activity of reading a book, I suddenly noticed that I put a lot of filler details that weren’t written concretely in the book but were ideas and most importantly emotions, that I brought into the reading itself to actually bring the text to life. As was mentioned in class, “the depth of an actor is how good he acts when he is not acting”. I view this quote similar to reading. It is the silent parts, the places with lots of space in the author’s writing that is beautiful because it offers lots of space to self-reflect and really isolate all variables and really hone in on your inner character. As an example to explain, Hyong Chol in chapter 2. When Hyong Chol was with his mom on the train, talking with her. The author did not write anything afterwards when the mom’s tears dropped on Hyong Chol’s face and separated that line with an indentation, a new paragraph. Within that space, I noticed that I brought in my emotions of how I would act if my mother cried because she couldn’t take care of me. I pictured and even believed Hyong Chol to be feeling emotions of protection, sadness, and incapability when the cold tears of his mom dropped onto his cheeks. The spaces that we subconsciously fill in are the spaces that offer isolation, that offer a control in scientific measures. Those are the places that offers a control of our character as Dean Miller would smile upon.
What you said is certainly true, and according to Miller, we are the one who interpret the information in a book, and that will most certainly force us to fill in details that makes us think what a certain plot might contain. As Amos Bronson Alcott stated "That is a good book which is opened with expectation, and closed with delight and profit."
DeleteReality seems to be the intersection between how you think others perceive you and how you, standing outside, perceive yourself, but, at some point, the line marking the distinction between the two blurs. As we live longer and experience more, we begin to see extremities appear on opposite ends of the spectrum used to create a standard. Each person takes part in the process of finding a spot that establishes a temporary balance, as perception can change over time. However, the way in which we view others is, to a certain extent, a reflection of the way we view ourselves, making it is impossible to look at ourselves from a completely objective point of view.
ReplyDelete“The question is not what you look at, but what you see.” ― Henry David Thoreau.
The construction of father is particularly interesting, because not only do we see how others perceived father in his marriage, we also see how father viewed himself in the relationship. Neither of his children emphasized his lacking presence in their lives nor blamed him for losing mom in Seoul. Looking back, however, father harshly criticized himself for missing out on a huge part of his relationship with mom simply because he didn’t think twice about his actions. At the time, father watched as mom could never catch up with him or her headaches grow worse, but he never saw much behind it. At first, it seemed that father placed his own actions to a much harder standard than he did the actions of others, a point which came up during our class discussion. I realized, however, that father was just as critical of mother. In the past, he saw only the negatives of mom, and now, he sees only the negatives of himself, clarifying the idea that “the outer world is a reflection of the inner world.”
When we seek change for ourselves, we often times comment on the lives of others to come up with a mental list of what we find as acceptable. It is amazing to see how much of the criticism these judgments have of us. Thus, an infinite loop is created where our judgment of others circles back as an extension of self-judgment, and so forth.
Your writing is somewhat touching to an extent and even though I wrote something similar to the concept that you've brought up, you've refreshed it in a different way. I do believe that since we know that a lot of times we make up a lot of junk about how people perceive us, we can use this eye opener to really be comfortable with who we are and just disregard opinions about us. Do you think it's ever possible to break out of our experiences and cultural biases to look at things?
DeleteBerry:
DeleteI completely agree with you on the comment that "it is impossible to look at ourselves from a completely objective point of view," because we will always have a set perception and thus what we think we are perceiving is distorted. We see ourselves in other people basing on our experiences with this individual. Just like how you mentioned that Dad viewed himself critically like he viewed Mom. I think the quote you used was very fitting to the Dad and Mom's relationship in that he never saw that Mom was in pain or why she acts in certain ways, he merely saw her being her. And yes, relating to our own lives, we often look at other people to see what's acceptable and what's not and take in other people's criticism. It is indeed an infinite loop from third party viewing us to us viewing others and finally back to ourselves. But Is it possible to get rid of our personal biases and view others in an objective point of view?
“A painter may be looking at the world in a way which is very different from everyone else. If he's a craftsman, he can get other people to see the world through his eyes, and so he enlarges our vision, perception, and there's great value in that.” – Edward de Bono. It is true that we see the worlds in which we want see it, but the problem is where does everything start? Just by contemplating on who we rely in our perception, as Miller argues, is constructed by us and that we use what we see to shape that meaning. However, by looking at the other side, we could also be participating in our shape unconsciously, as the reality of what we see is directed by our previous experiences. As shown in Plato’s Cave Analogy, the prisoners could not sense what was real or not as the fire and the actual sun formulated the discrepancy of what is Good and what is not. Because of only seeing one perspective from one angle, we are prone to believe that perspective is reality and that reflects us to others. Indeed, our perception may certainly portray what we want to see, but it does not portray what reality might really be.
ReplyDeleteIn the Novel, Please Look After Mom, initially, it is quite obvious that we learn the daughter, Hyong-Chol, and the Father much more than the mother, who is still surprisingly mysterious in some ways, but their reality is also slowly uncovering what actually happened by putting themselves in someone else’s shoes. Throughout the novel, each of the characters always led themselves into a flashback of their encounter not just with Mom, but also with each other of their family and friends. In Father’s daily life, he identified himself by looking at his encounter with his elders, notably his mother-in-law’s interaction with his wife, and later on his sister. Interestingly enough, Freud would relate this back to the parent to child relationship, and one could expect the same association occurred between Hyong-chol, Chi-hon and So-Nyo. Yet, by first looking at both Hyong-chol and the daughter’s point of view first, it is very intriguing to think that Father had more than a generation of experience than his son and daughter. This time period of difference is what sets the parent and the children apart, and the knowledge gap changes how everyone originally behaved with mom before and after her disappearance. As Irving Berlin quoted, “Life is only 10 percent what you make it and 90 percent of how you take it.” The 10 percent is what the family decided to take and the rest is pretty much the experience of pursuing that route.
It shook me when you said that life is only 10 percent of what we make it and 90 percent of how we take it. I feel that a lot of times when I have fears to speak up in class or when I have fears to take risks it's all in the weakness of my mind. Do you think it can also be a weakness into believing that life is 90 percent of how we take it?
Delete@Mark
DeleteThank you for your response. Though the percentages seems a bit exaggerated, it gives the impression that, from both a psychological and a personal experience, sight is what we rely most in everyday life. For that, it is definitely a weakness as our sight biases our perception of our surroundings and usually blocks off other subtle mentality.
Hey Kevin,
DeleteI certainly agree with how “our perception may certainly portray what we want to see, but it does not portray what reality might really be.” I think a lot of the times, we filter through our minds to see what we think is right or logical, but fail to see what is really put out there in front of us. Sometimes, we need to take a step back and think about what we have done, and then reflect upon it to realize what we have missed out. The Father in Please Look After Mom certainly noticed the odd behaviors of Mom after Mom went missing. Do you think that there would have been other instances/chances (meaning without Mom’s disappearance), which the Father would realize his own and Mom’s problems?
“It should be none of your business what others think of you”. The reason I chose this quote is because I think it addresses a key point in self construction. You shouldn’t care about how others perceive you. How others perceive you should not be how you perceive yourself. This is because I think when we construct others identity’s (as is done in PLAM) we are perceiving them from our circumstance, and the way you perceive someone says more about yourself and your self identity than it does about the person in front of you. Yet this being stated, in the long run does it really matter what you think you self identity is if people perceive you in an entirely different manner? I’m not sure. Sadly, I think there are very few people who are able to maintain their own constructed identity without changing based on others perceptions of them. Your sense of self, is something which is constructed by the role models in your life in the beginning, but this has room to change as one gets older. Your sense of who you are would be very different depending on the circumstances of your life so I think it is almost impossible to say that who you are comes from within, because it is influenced by everything around you.
ReplyDeleteIn the novel Please Look After mom, Dad is a character who’s own construction of his self-identity is almost non-existent. I say this because once mom is gone, I think Dad realizes that everything he ever did, and everything he ever was and every way he saw himself was through mom and mom’s actions. He realizes that without mom he doesn’t even know who he is. His whole life he was guided by a women who he barely knew, but who made him who he was. I again, don’t know if this is a good or bad thing because I think this revelation may prove his love (?) towards his wife. But it also proves that Dad doesn’t know who he is without the context of someone else, which means he constructed his self-identity based on what mom perceived him as.
Victoria,
DeleteI agree with you when you say that paying too much attention to what others think of you is a key aspect of self-destruction. Miller's point is a clearly evident in your reflection, like how our comments on others say more about ourselves than it does about the personality of the other person. I actually think Dad did have his own identity, but that when he was looking back at his entire relationship with mom, he realized the identity he had wasn't the one he wanted or hoped for. I do agree, however, that, especially in mom's chapter, we see Dad relying on mom a lot.
Victoria:
DeleteYour point about how people should self construct their own identity is quite valid. The fact that you also point out how these days people are more swayed by what others think of them, having others construct their identity for them, rather than self making their identity, is a very pressing issue and sadly the reality we all come to accept. I actually haven't thought about how Dad's identity is built up by Mom. Now that you have brought it to the light, I now see and agree that Dad's identity is ultimately influenced and built up by Mom. While his identity is built up by a woman he disregarded for so long, he failed to self construct his own image and thus when Mom is lost, he too is also lost. This also just proves your point of how important it is to self construct and disregard what others think of you. In a world like this where we see things immediately on the surface of things, do you think there is a way to construct ourselves in our own image and not what others or the society perceive as 'acceptable'?
Before reading your response, I had never really thought of own self identity as being never truly our own, because from the beginning our parents and other role models (and/or the environment we grow up in) pretty much shape who we are. In a more optimistic view, I would say we really get to know our own selves by understanding that we can take bits and parts of outside influences and create a "self" that is truly our own. On the other hand, I also do believe that other people's opinions and thoughts on who we are ultimately do affect every way we choose to act/behave/express ourselves.
DeleteIt is interesting that you say the father seems to not really know who he is without mom by his side. Even though throughout their marriage, the fatehr rarely took good care of his wife nor really expressed his love for her, he does seem to end up extremely lonely and lost once their mom goes missing. It makes me question what was/is the father's role in the family (besides providing financial support?), if the children and the father all seemed to recall that mom was the one who seemed to truly hold the family together?
Hi Victoria,
DeleteI agree with you in that self-identity has become farther and farther from the idea of self as one takes the opinions of others into consideration. Nonetheless, i think it begs the question of how self constructed exactly is self-identity? When constantly tampered with by perceptions of how others perceive you, are you still capable of controlling the manipulation of your own self identity and your own sense of sense? I think not as in an evolving society where external values apparent to others have become more prevalent, one's self identity no longer exist in one self but construction in light of others.
The concept of perception and reality is quite nebulous in a sense that these concepts have no real boundaries; anything we perceive could be our reality or the reality is not what we really perceive o be. The exercises done during class were refreshing because I discovered how little I actually know about the person across from me apart from the superficial ‘observations. I could see that my perception of this particular individual is constructed based on what I previously remember about her. Moreover, I realized that a lot of the things I picked out of her are things I focus on more in myself, thus the meaning here is self-reflective; the first thing I listed about her is that she is an athlete because I can relate. In the other exercise, we looked at ourselves from other people’s perspectives. But is it really what they see? It is arguable that our perception of a third party’s perception could be distorted to fit our own beliefs and reality. Just as Miller suggests that we construct meaning from our own minds, we see ourselves from other people’s point of view but those “point of views” are merely another set of our own perceptions.
ReplyDeleteWe see in the novel Please Look After Mom, the author uses perspectives to guide the reader through the plot of the story, the emotions, memories, and perceptions of each character. Through the exercises done in class, it made me wonder how accurate are my perceptions? In the novel, we see characters describing their experiences and perception of this woman but just how much of what they believe is true? The Dad’s character is shown in chapter 3 and we see how his perception of his wife shifts after the incident. His whole perception changed from perceiving her as the nagging woman who always walked behind him to the longing woman who walked slowly. Dad’s perception of Mom is different than Hyong-Chol’s or Chi-Hon’s because he had different interaction and memories with Mom. Through Dad’s perceptions, according to Miller, we might be able to see Dad himself. Dad’s reminiscence of Mom implies that once, years ago, he cared for the girl who cried in the fields but he also shut her out and discarded her along the way.
In our perceptions we see ourselves because our mind is at work focusing on what we personally believe in. For me, Jonathan Foer’s quote: “songs are as sad as the listener,” describes how I view the concept of perception. A sad song is only sad when I am feeling sad and a happy song is not a happy song when I am feeling down. Foer’s quote reflects Miller’s idea of how meaning is constructed by our minds. In our society today judgments and criticisms are emphasized and for each individual, these are some mere factors we use either consciously or subconsciously begin to shape ourselves into the ideal self in our perception versus the reality seen by others.
Penny,
DeleteI agree with your views on perception of others as a self-reflective process. I especially like you example of the in-class activity where you actually noticed yourself pin pointing something about someone simply because that something (in this case being an athlete) is an aspect of your self identity which you value. I wonder if the change in Dad's perception of mom after she is gone also reflects a change in his own self-identity? Or is his shift in perspective just a realization of how he acted before.
As Miller argued, we construct meaning by ourselves, and indeed, from everyone's daily experiences, his argument supports itself. Yet, the idea of meaning, where most people seems to trouble upon is meaning does not necessary be the 'reality' in that it is the truth. Leading up to that, do you not think your use of "nebulous" is a bit too strong in a sense that, we are always wandering aimlessly to find what is right especially through our senses?
Delete“All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth.”
ReplyDelete― Friedrich Nietzsche
The journaling activity really put together how easily what we think is the “truth” can be altered by perception. When I define my peers, I describe them with their visual appearances or small irrelevant moments in which the person was present. Yet intuitively, I would create what I think would be the person’s personality, using those small and almost insignificant snippets of information. For example, I would remember a small memory where that person picked up books that were dropped on the floor in the library and my assumption is that he is kind. But my reality of who that person is has nothing to do with what he/she told me about himself/herself. It is almost like having a few puzzle piece scattered around and then I have to paint the gaps in to create a picture. And that picture, mostly likely has less to do with who that person is and more to do with who I am.
During that journaling activity, I noticed that people describe others differently. In the sense, that people notice different aspects of a person like what they usually wear, what clubs they are in, what things they have said before, what sports do they do or what religion they believe. Each of these aspects (and there are many more not included), are of different importance to the interpreter. Thus the certain values or traits are more heavily emphasized when that value or trait is of importance to the interpreter.
“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
― C.G. Jung
The usage of perception in the book, Please Look after Mom, forces readers to guess and create personalities for the main characters. As readers we get to hear Chi Hon’s perspective of her mother in the very first chapter. Even though Chi Hon is remembering memories of her mother, I learned a lot more about Chi Hon’s independent and creative personality. The different memories she remember, from the conversations she had with her mom and the times her mom cooked ramen for her brother, reflects less about what type of mother Chi Hon’s mother is like and more about Chi Hon’s pride in her books and the hint of jealousy she has over her brother Hyong Chol. Throughout the next few chapters we learn a lot more about how others portray her. These anecdotes have less to do with her thoughts and ideas and more about her old habits and the times she was published on the newspaper. It is interesting to see the disparity between Chi Hon’s own feelings and what is translated in her outward personality.
Clark Chang
ReplyDeleteMr. Franklin
Honors World Literature B1
April 8, 2014
Perception and Reality
The construction of Mom’s character is rather mysterious. Even at the end of her narrative, many gaps still remain about who she really is. It brings to mind the fact we will never really know a person entirely for we can never inhabit the world within their own minds. However, this is even further complicated when we get to realization that Mom was the narrator all along. As a reader, we realize that what was initially thought to be the perspectives of her children and husband was further layered from Mom’s (as a narrator) own viewpoint. Throughout the book, the people around her all feel like they owed mom an apology or that they have done something wrong to deserve what had happened. We also see that Mom herself felt like she owed her children more, and regret that she got upset with them at times. Following Miller’s idea, it is likely that she more easily sees her children’s feelings of inadequacy due to being able to relate to how she felt about her success as a mom. Similarly, it is also very likely that I have read Mom to be this way due to trying to see myself in her character.
I have been thinking about how people perceive me for a long time. Honestly, I probably overthink it more than I really should. My sense of self and the way I present myself to others is admittedly quite heavily influenced by the way (I think) people perceive me. It’s not easy to simply “be myself” and after a while of acting I start to wonder who I really am. I am quite different with the people I am close to, people that are more aware of my fears and anxieties. I would say that how I act in the context of those kinds relationships most closely mirrors who I am internally. However I’m sure that even then, I tend to hide some part of who I am.
“...What happens is of little significance compared with the stories we tell ourselves about what happens. Events matter little, only stories of events affect us.”
― Rabih Alameddine, The Hakawati
What matters more than the hard facts and/or events that may be listed on the metaphorical timeline of our lives is the narrative we accompany with it. A single event of, for example a man waiting at a bus stop, is rather mundane and tells us nothing. But meaning is created when we start to craft a story about this stranger based on his appearance, actions, and intentions at that very moment. Without this narrative, the man is simply reduced to being a point, a statistic, of our universe.
Clark:
DeleteI think people's perceptions of us shape the way we act, and because of this I agree that is becomes hard to " be ourselves". Because what does that even mean? As you stated, the way we act becomes influenced by what others think of us, so do you think that there is some personal identity or truth about who we are before this outside influence comes in? I personally think that "knowing who you are" can only come later in life once you look back and reflect on how you acted in all of these different contexts.
Clark,
DeleteI think there's a fine line between overthinking people's perceptions of us and not thinking about it at all. I think just by the sheer amount of interaction we have to do daily, it's important to consider what other people think about us and filter this into our own understandings of ourselves. I also think that our sense of self is always dynamic and changing; it would be difficult to try to assign a static definition to that in answering the question "who i really am". I really agree with your point about how meaning is constructed through so much more than just one perspective or fact. It takes a combination of everything and every aspect to truly understand something.
“Humans see what they want to see” – Rick Riordan, The Lightning Thief
ReplyDeleteI think we, as humans, tend to want to see what we desire to be true or believe to be true. Whether it is a positive and optimistic outlook or a negative one, we often choose to deal with the easier truth and reality of situations/information we receive, because we are afraid to face something that is more challenging or requires more work to resolve.
For example, in “Please Look After Mom”, the siblings and the father are more comfortable with working somewhat passively in their search for their mother, especially in handing out fliers and posters to whomever they can on the streets. Because Hyung-chol, Chi-hon and the other relatives of their family have jobs and lives of their own, they each do the minimal amount of work in actively looking for their mother. The father of the children and husband of the missing mother seems to be one character that has always chosen to see what he only wanted to see, and for the most part ignored and did not acknowledge many of mom’s symptoms and issues. He always chose to reason that Mom’s inability to remember certain things, frequent nightmares, complaints about headaches, etc. were just because of her body weakening from aging. Despite obvious signs that she needed to be checked by the doctor, the father did not push very much or try and persuade that the mom needed treatment.
I think the father tried to ignore many things that were going on with the mother because he himself didn’t know what to do. This includes talking about Kyun’s death, which affected the mom very much, yet the father was too stubborn and unable to open up about his emotions over his youngest brother’s tragic life. Possibly because the father spent most his adulthood wanting to get out of his hometown where he lost his parents and other siblings at a young age, (and was dreaming of another life), he wasn’t prone to sharing his feelings with the rest of the family and did not believe he could do much in taking care of and helping his wife. In retrospect, I believe that our upbringings and what we desire affect how we deal with our own situations and relationships with the people closest to us. It is hard for us to view things from the perspective outside of what we would rather see because too often we want to find the easiest ways out of adversity to avoid more trouble or anxiety and stress.
Edenne,
DeleteI think that sometimes we, as people, ignore certain facts because either we know they are going to be too hard to handle or we don't know how to deal with them. Dad was not the only one to have done this, though. For example, Chi-hon, when looking back, realized that she should have known mom was illiterate from all the letters she had to read aloud and write for mom. What specifically, do you think, about dad's upbringing made him want to ignore these facts?
Edenne,
DeleteI really agree with your point of how humans tend to see what we want to see. In that sense, I think we can be very narrow minded and almost afraid to face the truth for fear of what it might reveal not about the situation but about ourselves. Particularly the father, as you mentioned, was guilty of this. I think that if he had forced himself to realize the mother's situation, he would have had to acknowledge his entire past of neglecting her and being unkind. He had done many things to her that he wasn't very proud of at all and because he was unwilling to face these facts, he ended up making it much worse.
I’ve discovered that a lot of Dean Miller and his concepts can be evoked through reading the novel, particularly after the fourth part. In the sudden realization of the narrator’s identity that has been anonymous prior to the last part, what was said previously all of a sudden takes on a different meaning. With the new mindset and understanding of the character of Mom intimately, it became possible to apply this to our previous readings, thus creating a whole new level of understanding and meaning. It’s just as Miller said, that a lot of our meaning is constructed through a certain understanding within us. I think his ideas were also illustrated poignantly in the character of Chi-hon. Specifically in the scene where the Mom runs out to greet her brother (Chi-hon’s uncle), Chi-hon suddenly sees her mom in the light of a person independent of the role she fulfilled as mother. And after that, she always looked at her mother slightly differently.
ReplyDeleteI found it really interesting to trace the development of Mom as a character. Until the fourth part, her role as narrator is unknown and thus what was known about her character was only what was said by those who knew her. But with the knowledge of her role, a lot more can be deciphered from the exact same text. Reading the same thing again doesn’t reveal anything more in terms of the concrete and yet so much more can be understood about Mom’s character. Similarly, after doing the activity in class where we had to surmise what people thought of us, I experienced a somewhat similar disconnection. While it’s obvious that you know yourself well as the “narrator”, all of a sudden we had to step back from that and try to understand what others thought. At the same time, however, it was impossible to truly disconnect with that role of narrator. And I found this activity to be quite enlightening in terms of understanding my concept of self and how this is perhaps independent of or built upon other people’s ideas of me.
“Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.”
― Wayne W. Dyer
Although the revelation of Mom as the narrator helps us to see her in a different light, I think it also served to cloud up some aspects about who she really was. Instead of a bunch of disjointed viewpoints, everything was now under control of one narrator. The family's perception towards Mom was now put through another lens of Mom herself.
DeleteAs you have mentioned, this gives us a scenario similar the one in class where we had to think about what others think of us. Exactly how accurate is our perception of other people's interpretations of us? It gets rather complicated as it relies on a great deal of assumptions about others. Out of our perception of ourselves and other people's view of us, which one is more real? After reading Mom's point of view, it is revealed that we get none of those view points but rather what she thinks her family thinks. That gives us many layers of biases to dig through before we can find the "truth".
Trini Wong
ReplyDeleteMr. Franklin
Honors World Literature (B1)
April 9, 2014
Perception and Reality
“To change ourselves effectively, we first had to change our perceptions” by Stephen R. Covey.
It is really hard to notice the difference between perception and reality when we look at things. It was extremely difficult to point out what we have missed out, because we do not know what we are missing. It does take a lot of thinking to get to the answer and truth. There is not a clear line of what the truth is and what is filtered through our minds, so it is hard to define what is real. In order to achieve something, we need to change the way we look at things. We need to learn and change our perceptions to change the way we are. When we did the perception activity for both our peers and ourselves in class, I thought it was really interesting to see how we much we know about our peers and how we think others perceive us. It was really hard to list things out when I did not know much about the person whom I was writing about. However, sometimes we already do automatically make judgments or assumptions before we even get to know the person personally, because we hear things from a third party that may or may not be the truth. What the third party tells us is filtered through his/her filters then it is filtered through us once again.
Mom in Please Look After Mom has been described multiple times by multiple people that are either close or strangers to her. Each person that described her has some similarity in the way that he or she described her, but they each have a different relationship with her. We need to take into an account that each person may have perceived Mom differently (based on what they really saw or how they wanted to see Mom from their own self-reflective component). After that, the listeners (Mom’s children) filter the information again, and then we filter again. So Mom’s description really has been filtered three times in the novel. Mom has been a character that the reader’s do not know much about. There have been descriptions of Mom and what Mom does, but we do not know the reason behind her doings until later on. I can say for myself that I made my own reasons that sounded reasonable or relatable to me to create explanations for Mom’s doings. This relates back to Miller’s idea that we put meaning in by self-reflection. What is more important is that how one person acts around might be different than how others perceives one, just like what we get out of from reading a book, might be different from the author’s intent. We lose the true meaning of the text by our own interpreted meaning.
It is a rather strange feeling when you realize that you know pretty much nothing about someone that you have been working with every other day for months on end. Many of those gaps are filled with our assumptions without a second thought while other details may be doubted even if we had a reason to believe them.
DeleteAs I get to know people, at some point I wonder: "am I trying too hard to see myself in this other person or are we actually that similar"? It is hard to get out of our own minds and view things objectively.
However, I don't think that it makes our perceived reality any less "real". I wouldn't go so far as to say that our interpretations makes us lose the "true meaning" of anything. If we were to take this analogy further, we can assume that when we perceive others, we miss out on what they want us to see them as. In a hypothetical situation, we can have a person with a really kind heart that somehow brings destruction everywhere he goes. However, you have to ask yourself, how much of that hidden "true" self is really true or relevant if we can never see it?
Hey Clark,
DeleteIt is strange and sorta disappointing (to me at least) that we often fill those gaps with our assumptions of the people we don’t know much about in our class to complete their pictures in our minds.
I really thought your analogy was great, because it made me think through my point of view of perception and reality again. I think the hidden true self is the truth after all (although it may be difficult to find out about it), but it is the truth and only the true self will know about it. How we perceive someone/something is projected as the truth to our own eyes, but it may or may not be the truth to the someone/something.
Hi Trini,
DeleteI agree with what you mentioned about the filters by bringing up the activity we did in class. I can conclude from what you have mentioned that such filtered perception of another person should not be taken too seriously it is not a conclusive picture of who you really are. Thus, such automated judgements as you mentioned should not have be any indication or have any impact on your own constructed self identity. Nonetheless, perception is so subjective that it varies from person to person, but the consideration of opinions and views that aren't your own may only distract yourself from finding that real truth about yourself ;)
Ethan Lin
ReplyDeleteMr. Franklin
Honors World Literature (B1)
April 9th, 2014
Perception and Reality
At the onset of the fourth part of Please Look after Mom, the readers learn that the narrator has been Mom the entire time. Following this realization is a revelation that the entire plot line may not have been a realistic presentation of what actually happen, but is rather a reflection and commentary by the main subject of conflict, the Mom. Simultaneously, in the fourth part of the novel, we learn in greater detail the character that is the youngest daughter in the Yun family. I believe she is the most comprehensive representation of the intertwinement of perception and reality. The entire construction of the youngest daughter is based upon sentiments spawned from Mom’s experiences. The youngest daughter is believed to be the “free from poverty” in that she throughout her childhood has received far more in relativity to her siblings. Moreover, it is even explained from Mom’s perspective that this is actually a conscious decision made because the mere existence of the youngest daughter empowers and alleviates Mom from the previous unwanted and aching pain of the fourth child. The entirety of this character speaks dear to the concept of perception and reality. On a superficial level, the youngest daughter believes that she is the fourth child, but in actuality she is not. On a deeper level, her existence is the manifestation of Mom’s pain and in turn release. This is why the youngest daughter is celebrated as the most achieving and righteous sibling of the four. Mom finds meaning from the existence of the youngest daughter in that she is the anesthesia to her suffering and loss. Her survival is the redefinition of Mom’s life and it is expected that Mom’s ideals be promoted through the transcription of the younger daughter’s life. Nonetheless, it is we who create the meaning of who the youngest daughter is and what she means to the story, but it is also we who undergo the means of self-reflection in resonance to the discovery of the filter in which the younger daughter is presented.
“Songs are as sad as the listener.”
It its exact words, this quote by Jonathan Safran Foer from Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, embodies the personalized, self-reflective process of cognition. What we believe to be true is dependent on how we interpret subjective truth. Subjective truth is a compilation of sensory details. Whether it is a word heard or a picture seen, it is ultimately up to us to give it meaning. Songs are as sad as the listener just as truth is only as meaningful as its interpretation. Even our self of self is constructed from various subjective truths. Our interpretation of how others view us, the interpretation of how we ought to be, and the interpretation of how we are really like, in congruence with each interpretation we construct our own truth.
I agree with the fact that the entirety of the book comes into question once we realize that Mom has been the narrator the entire time. The book is layered with different perceptions: the mother is perceiving how her children perceives her. What is reality or the "truth" becomes blurred, because there seems to have so much filtration due to bias. I am curious about how one can perceive truth when everything we understand is filtered by one's biases. Also I also wonder how we as readers can consolidate the fact that the narrator is Mom in the book Please Look After Mom and the "truth" of who is Mom. Or even if knowing the truth matters.
DeleteMichael Pai
ReplyDeleteMr. Franklin
Honors World Lit (B1)
April 9, 2014
The ideas of perception and reality provide quite interesting thought in that anything we experience is a reality, a true fact, which ironically is altered by our perception. When we try to “read” others, we do so by comparing them to others we have met throughout our lives. Yet in every previous interaction there’s always that element of “what does the other person think of me?” By thinking about how others view us, every interaction builds a stronger perceived self-image. Regardless if this self-image is positive or negative, it provides a source for our insecure selves to view others.
In “Please Look After Mom,” the siblings come to realize the heroics of their mother and how much they have turned a blind eye to her actions. They come to appreciate the care they have received under the supervision of Mom. Through this process the characters perhaps come to understand the reasons behind their previous ways; as a result, they subconsciously focus on traits such as appreciation and respect. Thus, their view of others can change for better or worse depending on how others manage to display such qualities.
The quote ““You will always define events in a manner which will validate your agreement with reality” by Steve Maraboli is interesting. It appears as if reality is indeed a perceptive subject and so this brings up the question, what determines our reality? Our reality is definitely shaped by our experiences but more importantly, our experiences early in our lives. As babies, we spend quite some time without language or primitive language. Yet during this period, our thinking doesn’t stop as we can still read emotions such as happiness or sadness that somehow exist without our knowledge of such words. It is during this period that our experiences mold our view of the world by highlighting certain features as attractive and others as repulsive.
Hey Michael,
DeleteI was quite curious after reading your response. You said that “every interaction builds a stronger perceived self-image", but what if you live alone and do not interact with other people? Does that mean you do not know yourself well and that you will never have a complete self image? I do believe that interactions build a stronger perceived self-image, but how can you perceive yourself if you have no interactions at all? I have to agree with you that reality is shaped by experiences, because without experiences there would be no reality to live in.
Michael, Im curious as to what you think allows us to "read" people through exchanges with other. I did not think we perceived through a sharing/exchange system, but am curious what you would think about understanding and feeling through another person that experienced it. I relation to the book I find it interesting how you also concluded that the kid's interpretation of moms actions come from understanding her when she is gone. I think this might have to do with it stirring emotions they repressed back when she caused those feelings. IM curious to hear what you think.
DeleteAdrian Zenteno
ReplyDeleteMr.Franklin
HWLB1
“The eye sees only what the mind is prepared to comprehend.” –Robert Davies. This quote has truth to me on in both physical and abstract ways. What makes it such a powerful quote is the connection from the strong basic understanding to the abstract meaning behind it. We physically do not notice completely new objects/details unless we are ready to see something new. This factor of a physical observation ties in to our action of “seeing” others and analyzing a person. Often a judgment passed onto another person is a preconditioned label that we have been exposed to. This would mean our concept of what a person is like is based off of our own concept of what people are like. When we look deeper, often these labels we have to utilize come from aspects that we see in our own personality. This would essentially mean our labeling of others comes directly from the labels we have of ourselves. For example a definition of energetic would most likely come from one’s own feelings/experience in an energetic state.
Relating this to our novel, each of the kid’s definitions of mom would reflect back on aspects of them. Because they can only have personal examples from their life to create meaning of an emotion/characteristic the descriptions we see of mom can also help us to analyze the personality of the kids. For example Hyong-chol constantly refers to mom as selfless and nurturing. His definition of nurturing would come from his feelings as the older brother to help raise his siblings.
I agree with the idea that the characters' perceptions of their mother/wife in Please Look After Mom are based upon their own characteristics and personalities. Chi-hon had felt that her relationship with mom wasn't very close and she would often get annoyed by mom's constant questions about her travels and her work. I think one characteristic of Chi-hon is that she doesn't often open up to people by talking, but instead expresses her thoughts and feelings through writing. Chi-hon wasn't able to communicate with her mother as much as she would have liked, and really only ever shared one of her book tour experiences with blind readers to her mom. Yet, her mother had found other ways to read her daughter's books and was actually recognizing and reading the work Chi-hon had written and published. If Chi-hon had reached out to her mom earlier on about her life as a writer, Chi-hon would have realized that her mom cared and felt proud of her just as she was proud of her older brother Hyong-chol. I think Chi-hon wasn't aware of this fact because she never truly tried to involve her mom and the rest of the family with her occupation as a writer.
Delete